currently...

Reading: I read the fifty shades of grey trilogy and it was incredible. It was intense but so well written and I absolutely fell in love with the characters.

As soon as I finished fifty shades, I began the divergent series because it was recommended to me. I just have to say... AMAZING! If you read the hunger games trilogy and liked it do yourself a favor a read these! I enjoyed them much more than hunger games! Only the first 2 are out.. Need to wait a year for the final book.. But it was so good!

Dealing with: lately I have been feeling very defeated. We have had a difficult last 2 years and it seems like we can't catch a break. Between disappointments in tests, failed job searches, and too much death and illness, I feel like I am struggling to catch my breath. A family should not suffer as much as we have. But then I tell myself that this is all in God's hands. I need to just let go and let God.

Looking forward to: Summer! I only have 18 more days with the kiddos at work and 21 days at the school. I am so ready for a break!

Thinking: The grass is always greener. Yes, I am guilty of this... All the time! I compare myself to everyone, especially other mothers. I have to work, they don't. I have no money, they do. My clothes suck, they always look so cute. I didn't have time to brush my hair, she has makeup on. This list goes on forever. I need to get over it now!

Wishing: For a little more positivity in my life.

Ok... Negative rant over.

Checking in...

There is always an excuse for my absence and right now it has a lot to do with books (you must read the fifty shade trilogy and the divergent series), lots of delicious cuddles from my olive ball, and a little bit of family stress interspersed here and there.

Alex did not pass the bar... We had a rough week last week and now we are looking ahead to hopefully so new possibilities.

Be back soon!

Ps... Keep an eye out for a new blog design ...

dear olivia..

to my dear olivia,
today marks 8 years that i have been with your papa. it is crazy to think how many time has passed and how much our lives changed in these 8 years. have i told you how we met?

believe it or not.. your papa used to have hair!!!

it all started with your tia caro (papa's sister) and her little obsession with your tio javi (mama's brother). you see, when they were just 13, tia caro had a big, big crush on javi and in turn became friends with your madrina (mama's sister) to get closer to javi. a couple years pass and the crush is over but the friendship remains. caro asked madrina and javi to be part of her 15th birthday. when your 2 abuela's began to realize that their oldest children would be prefect for each other the meddling began. after a forced visit to caro's house so that mama could meet papa there began our love story.

i have many hopes for you. i hope that you live your life happy doing exactly what makes your heart sing. i hope that you have good friends, friends that will be by your side through thick and thin. i hope that you live a long life. with all of that said, my biggest hope is that one day you find someone that makes you as happy as your papa has made me. someone that through it all is your best friend and your lover. the person that no matter what you can crawl into bed at the end of the day and know that tomorrow you will still have each other. someone that loves you so much that nothing else matters. i hope for you love. the kind of love that i have had for the last 8 years and the love that i hope to have for the rest of my life.

love always,
your mama

currently.

i have seen danielle over at sometimes sweet do this and i have always loved it. although im too late to link up i thought it would be fun to do it anyways.

olivia while i was typing this up.

reading: about a month ago, i got back into reading. i read the hunger games trilogy (umm.. im obsessed) and in that sparked a love for any book that dealt with dystopian societies or post apocalyptic societies. i read the pretties series and then i read the first two books in the matches series (the thirds book has not been released yet). and then my obsession turned into something completely different. after been hooked to the show the walking dead for the last two years, i finally decided to start reading the comic. i flew through the first 7 volumes and then had to stop myself because i wasnt sleep (hello! all i could think about was how i was going to survive the zombie apocalypse). i keep hearing about 50 shades of grey and i think im getting intrigued

watching: has anyone been watching smash? gcb? REVENGE? i watch way too much tv. my show list goes on forever but right now i am really looking forward to a date night with my dvr so that i can catch up with me one true love, vampire diaries.

working on: starting a mini business.. more on that soon!

thinking about: lately i have really been feeling cheated. i am a good person. i am married to the best kind of man! and still it seems as though hard ship follows us around. yes, we are blessed. we are healthy. we have a very healthy, and beautiful little girl. but must a family suffer so much? i wonder why it is that i feel this way. i know i need to see the positive in my life but when i am constantly being struck with negativity, it is really hard to see the positive.

anticipating: monday. we find out if alex passed the bar exam. please, please pray for our little family. we really cannot handle any more disappointments or heart ache.

wishing: i had a little bit more time for me. i am feeling stretched in so many directions and most of the time i dont even feel like cooking at the end of the day. i wish there were 25 hours a day.. i think that would do it!

i will punch you if you touch my baby...

 ok maybe i won't punch you.. but i will run away!

what is with the grocery store?! remember when this happened? yea, now that olivia is this adorable, chunky, delicious, beautiful (ok, shes mine so i am probably a little bias..) little girl every one comes up to her to talk to her. now i am all about complementing a cute baby. i do it too.. who doesnt? but some people take it way too far! wondering what happened? well it went something like this...

olivia and i were doing our usual, going down every aisle because sometimes i forget i never remember to do a grocery list. i kept noticing that this weird man and his wife were following us around the store making comments about how cute she was. i tried my best to ignore them and tried to finish up quickly so i could get the hell out of there. and then it happened. as i went to go down a different aisle, they surprise attacks us and approach us to say hi. (as a side note.. i get pretty awkward with strangers. i never know what to say and sometimes i wont even respond when spoken to. it can come off as a little rude but HELLO... they make me uncomfortable!) the man proceeded to take away olivia's pacifier and see if she would take to him! THE MAN TOOK MY BABIES PACIFIER FROM. HER. MOUTH! so what is a mama to do? i didn't say anything, left the man with his stolen pacifier and ran down the aisle pushing my shopping cart.

crazy much?

i guess all those talks my mom gave me about not talking to strangers really worked.. maybe too well?

please don't judge me.